Tag Archives: David

(Friday, Dec 16, 2011)  In this, our final blog in this series, we’ll finish talking about recovery from dysfunction.  Jesus is our example in healthy living.  He set boundaries, and we must do the same.  There are several good books you can read on this subject for more information and insight. We also started looking at Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, as a way to better understand and implement boundaries.  We’ll conclude that study in this blog. A time to kill and a time to heal.  Notice the order: death comes first, then healing.  There are thoughts, patterns, ideas and memories that need to be killed.  We have monsters to face, pain to feel, fear to work through and bitterness to confess.  Then, and only then, will God heal. A time to tear down and a time to build … a time to tear and a time to mend.  Tearing down must come … Continue reading →

(Wednesday, Dec 14, 2011)            As in all things, Jesus is our model of healthy Christian living.  Often we think He wouldn’t care or understand, but that just isn’t so!  He knows all we go through, not just because He is God but because He went through everything we go through (Heb. 4:15-16). For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are– yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.             If you wonder how He could possible understand, just remember His life.  His mother was pregnant before getting married, and the gossip and criticism of that followed Him His whole life (John 8:41).  He was … Continue reading →

(Friday, Dec. 9)  We’ve been looking at the effects false guilt and shame can have on a family, using David’s family as an example.  If you don’t understand what false guilt is and how damaging it can be, read the previous blog.  We’ll finish talk about David’s family in this blog.             Individuals in shame-bound families tend to place the blame for their difficulties on other family members, not themselves.  Amnon blamed Tamar for being raped and so did David by his silence.  A husband may blame his affair or his drinking on his wife’s lack of sexual responsiveness to him instead of taking responsibility for his own sin.             In shame-based families, feelings are considered to be ‘bad,’ so emotions are ignored, denied or punished.  That happened to Amnon and Absalom.  Certain members of shame-based families tend to dominate and strive to maintain the status quo. David was afraid … Continue reading →

(Wednesday, Dec 7, 2011)             There is an old Jewish proverb that says “Shame is an iron fence that guards us from sin.”  That’s true.  Feeling shameful (guilty) for sinful behavior acts as a preventative.  It’s only helpful, though, if the shame and guilt we feel is true, legitimate, God-given shame.  Unfortunately we learn to feel guilty about many things that we shouldn’t feel guilty for, such as our own legitimate needs and thinking of ourselves as equal to other people.  While God created guilt to motivate us to keep form sin, and to confess it as soon as we commit it, many people are taught to feel guilty about things that aren’t sinful.  This leads to much confusion.  ADAM & EVE were the first to feel any shame for they were the first to sin.  They covered themselves and hid from God (Gen. 3:7).  This was healthy, legitimate spiritual shame … Continue reading →